Wow, what a ride!
Over the course of the last few months I’ve been furiously working on my humorous memoir, ‘TTITC’ and I’m happy, no, exhilarated to say, “It. Is. Finished.” I wrote the last word two days ago and I still can’t breathe. Though to tell you the truth, I didn’t think I would feel so sad over it at the same time. I’m happy and ecstatic, true, but those emotions are tinged with a feeling of sadness. Perhaps this is a natural reaction in saying farewell to a book that I’ve nurtured and coddled over the last six or seven years. One that I’ve cried and laughed over, hated and loved, treated carefully and ignored for months on end, but in the end, one that I always came back to. Working day and night, many a night burning the midnight oil over and not truly knowing if I’d ever finish or not. I don’t really know, beings it’s the first full-length novel I’ve completed and one that is so intensely and personally connected to me. And so I wonder, is this a normal reaction?
It seems to me like it’s taken a very long time to finish and I think part of it was my fear of finishing it. I think I became complacent with it, because I wanted to have something to love and not love at the same time, and it gave me something to feel excited over and yet complain about every day, but it also gave me motivation knowing I wouldn’t be happy if I didn’t finish it. Perhaps I’m feeling sad over writing the last word because I have to find a way to let go of my child? Because that’s what the books and stories I write are, children. I’ve loved and nurtured my stories just like I’ve done for my human children, and it took years to get them (my human children) to a place of independence so I’m guessing it might be the same for a book or story that I’ve created and bore from my creative pool!
So now I find I must figure out how to let it go and move on to the next chapter (pun intended) of my writing life which is already in progress with a horror fiction I’ve been working on. I’ve been looking forward to getting back to those friends of mine who have been patiently waiting for me while I finished the memoir, and now with ‘TTITC’ finally finished I can turn my full and undivided attention back to them and their lives! I look forward to getting reacquainted with the friends I have there, and I hope they are willing to move forward with me once again. That is to say, I hope I have the chops to change gears and move from the memoir into the fiction and do it well. I’m pretty certain it’s going to be a painless transition, I just need to do some heavy reviewing and get my mind back to that temperament and I can’t wait to see how the horror fiction turns out!